May 2013
13 posts
1 tag
1 tag
2 tags
Perfect.
1 tag
April 2013
22 posts
1 tag
2 tags
Henry, Age 8, chose Pretty Woman over The Fifth...
Henry: Why is she wearing those huge boots?
Me: Do you know what a hooker is?
Henry: Yes.
Me: How?
Henry: An episode of The New Girl.
Henry: If Vivian's roomate spent the rent money on drugs, couldn't she just call the cops on her?
Henry: What did she say about your foot being the same length as your arm? Is she a nerd hooker?
Me: I'm going to fast-forward any sex stuff.
Henry: Please.
Henry: Oh My god she has a toupee? The blonde hair is a wig? Her long hair is way prettier.
Henry: This guy is a good actor (Jason Alexander)
Henry: Why did Edward say "stay in the shallow end" of the tub?
Me: It was a joke.
Henry: Not funny.
Henry: Oh man she needs new clothes now.
Henry: Why are those women in the store so idiotic? They kicked her out because of that outfit? She was going to spend money in their shop! EL STUPIDO.
Henry: She's getting in trouble at the hotel for her old clothes now? She needs new clothes SO BAD.
Henry: Vivian kind of looks like Sal, but in hooker boots.
Henry: I think she should have bought a lot of normal clothing, not just a cocktail dress.
Me: Look she has a new dress. Do you think he likes it?
Henry: Edward?
Me: Yes.
Henry Who cares, he's a pervert.
Henry: She's sitting on the edge of the building. I'm not afraid of heights, but I'm not idiotic enough to do that, I wouldn't be comfortable doing that. She's dumb.
Henry: The hotel manager is like, SHE IS AWESOME.
Henry: What are they watching? HORSE GOLF OR SOMETHING?
Henry: Yup, this is horse golf.
Henry: Vivian is going to be really mad at Edward for telling him she's a hooker.
Henry: Oh she's wearing the red dress from the commercial. She's going to laugh and he's going to do the clam book joke on her hand.
Henry: Does the elevator guy just stand in the elevator all day? That's a terrible job. I bet some guys just stand in there and play Angry Birds all day.
Henry: It takes 3 minutes to get to China from Calgary on a rocket. Sal told me that, but Sal is wrong about a lot of stuff.
Henry: If the hotel manager liked her so much, he should have given her a job in that hotel.
1 tag
1 tag
March 2013
20 posts
“The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach...”
– Eleanor Roosevelt
“Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us...”
– Source
